Nobody Likes Me
The most embarrassing thing about me that I can possibly tell you is what happened on my first day of kindergarten. I don’t really remember what happened at school, only that I came home crying. My mom asked why, and, through choking breaths and a runny nose, I replied: “No <gasp> body <gasp> likes meeeeeee!” […]
Pettier Cash
A quick follow-up on Monday’s post. When I turned in my petty cash envelope to get some more money, the accountant told me not to turn in a bunch of change. I asked why, and she said the other PA gave her, like, $5 worth of quarters. She had to count all of that out. […]
Petty Cash
I’m balancing my petty cash today. I’m supposed to do it on Fridays, but… Well, there’s no way to finish that sentence. I just didn’t do it. Whenever I turn in my envelope, the accountants are always surprised at how little change I have. This is because, in general, I try to spend exact change. […]
Distro
One of the basic tasks of a PA is distributing paperwork that no one wants to read. (With good reason, usually; more than a few times, I’ve passed out a memo regarding the fact that the elevators in our building would be shut down… on Saturday. When no one was going to be there.) As […]
How to Impress
A friend of mine discovered I write this blog, and is now playing a rousing game of “Guess the Roman à Clef.” She hasn’t gotten them all right, so I’m glad my attempts at obscuring my identity have had some effect. Anyway, she had a tip for getting on the director’s (or anyone else’s) good […]
How to Move Up from Reality TV to Real TV
Reader Kelly writes: I love your blog, just wanted to say that. Thanks for writing it. Awwww. Well, that’s it for today! …Oh, wait, no. She also had a question: I have been working more and more in production, specifically most recently in reality. How do I get into being a P.A. in features or […]
Oh, Goody! My First Reader Question!
Reader Brian sent me a question, proving once again that “expertise” is a meaningless concept on the internet. I really enjoy your blog — thanks for all the info and frequent posting. That’s not actually part of the question. It just made me feel good. I just applied for a PA position at a network […]
Updating IMDb
I’m trying to update my IMDb page because, even though everyone knows it’s totally inaccurate and completely unreliable, everybody uses it. It’s weird, I know. Updating is a pain in the ass. They expect you to update your TV credits episode-by-episode. That’s just bad web design. I’ve worked on more than sixty episodes of television […]
Job Search
I’m on a job hunt right now, much sooner than I’d expected. While perusing Craig’s List, I came across this ad. After the usual rigmarole about being diligent and hard working, the ad ends thusly: Please send a RESUME (with contact info)and a PHOTO. Wow. I like how he staunchly avoids using the feminine pronoun, […]
How to Get Your Script Read By Someone Other Than Your Mom
Okay, more detail may be required than that last post. Here’s what DJ actually asked: Can you describe how the process went with the writer reading your script? Did you ask or did he offer? How well did you know him? How long did it take for him to get back to you? Did he […]
Reading
DJ asks how I got a producer to read my script. I asked.
Sociopathy
Another part of Robert’s comment stuck in my head: The director is obviously doing what makes him happy…putting down caring souls such as yourself. I think this is a mistake people frequently make. Putting me down doesn’t make him happy. For that to make him happy, he’d have to care what I think. But he […]