Ellis writes in:
Newly minted PA here and I need some help with networking. Several crew members have given me their numbers and encouraged me to reach out and stay in touch.
Here is the problem: Some respond and others don’t. For those that don’t respond, do I continue to reach out and stay in touch? Do I take them off my contact list?
Why give me their number if they don’t intend to respond? How do I navigate this?
If you’re a newly minted PA, you’re probably a newly minted adult, too.1 You’re still getting used to the idea that you and everyone you know have a million responsibilities, from child care to paying bills to changing the oil in your car. You’re probably feeling overwhelmed by all of these duties, but don’t worry… that’s perfectly natural and will never go away.
So you should understand that important things come up all the time. They could be on the job, or in the hospital or on vacation in an exotic land where their cell phone doesn’t work. Or maybe they don’t like you.
The other possibility is that you’ve contacted them without giving them any sort of motivation to return the call. Are you asking for a job? If they don’t have one for you, there’s no reason to call/text/email you back.
Instead, maybe try asking if they want to meet for coffee or drinks or lunch. (Make sure this sounds super platonic. (Unless that’s what you’re going for.))
If you’ve texted three times (over the course of three months or so, hopefully), and never heard back, then stop bothering. Whatever the cause is, they’re just not that into you.
That being said, never, ever delete someone from your contacts. You never know when their email or phone number might come in handy. Save every crew list you ever get. I even hang onto cast lists when I get them.
- I know you think you became a grown up when you turned 18, but four years of film school suggest otherwise.↩