This morning, I walked into my boss’s office while eating a bite-sized candy bar.
“Oh, that’s a good way to start your morning.”
With annoying and omnipresent sarcasm? Oh, wait, the candy bar.
“Maybe, but I’m already two and a half hours into my morning.”
“I’m five and a half into mine.”
Really? Three in the morning? That’s a little bit… ridiculously unbelievable. Why the fuck are you getting up at three in the morning? I know it’s not getting yourself dolled up because, well, I can see you.
Have you ever found yourself in one of these conversations?
“I’ve only had five hours’ sleep.”
“Well, I’ve only had three hours’ sleep.”
“Yeah? I spent all day building a time machine, then went back to this morning, and, even though it’s only eleven o’clock, I’ve been awake 27 hours today.”
What is that about? Is there some kind of sleepless competition nobody told me about? Why are people so proud of this? Moreover, does the fact that you’re exhausted make me less tired? Or am I supposed to feel bad for at least trying to get a responsible amount of sleep?